Mr. Larson: Trying to reach the green from here Shooter?
Shooter McGavin: I'm afraid that's impossible sir.
Mr. Larson: I beg to differ. Happy Gilmore accomplished that feat no more than an hour ago.
Shooter McGavin: Well moron
[turns to see Mr. Larson for the first time]
Shooter McGavin: good for Happy Gimo - OH MY GOD!
lucy: Did Alicia marry that guy?
Marlin: yea.
Henry: Doug, did you win the Mr. Hawaiian contest?
Doug: I didn't know there wath gonna be a urine tethst.
Lucy: [to Henry] Did we have sex?
[Marlin and Doug look at Henry]
Henry: No, we didn't. Just so everyone knows
[Marlin and Doug turn away]
Henry: We want to!
[Marlin and Doug look again]
Henry: Just kidding.
Mitch Martin (Luke Wilson): True love is hard to find, sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a goddamn magic show ready to double team your girlfriend...
Mitch: Sorry, your seatbelt seems to be broken. What do you recommend I do?
Cab Driver: I recommend you stop being such a ***got. You're in the backseat.
Mooj: This is a great tv, nothing beats a plasma
Jay: What are you doing that's my customer
Mooj: It certainly is not; when I came upon her she was unattended
Jay: no no Das my... .
Jay: She was unattended because I went to the back to get the brochure she requested
Mooj: I apologize but it's too late the transaction is completedddd
Jay: Than you gunna give me half the commissioooon
Mooj: You will receive none of the commission
Jay: I need to talk to Paula, this is crazy man
Mooj: This is bullshit every time I make a sale you go crying to Paula, how about, how about Jesse Jackson, oh Jesse he needs a call
Jay: I'm sick of you poaching my customers
Mooj: I'm sick of your cry baby bullshit
Jay: You wanna take this shit outside just take it outside and squash it
Mooj: Let's stay inside so everybody can see what a pussy you have ok because when I remove the blade that I keep in my boot from its sheath I cannot return it until it has split blooood
Jay: Listen listen, you are ****ing with the wrong nigga
Mooj: Hey hey you are ****ing with the wrong sand nigga ok
Jay: I will hang your old ass by your turban
Mooj: Oh, turban now! Do you see any ****ing turban here? Do I talk like a turban guy? Do I say 'Hey Jay, you want a slurpee? You wanna slurpee?' **** you, okay? I was born in Brooklyn, Brooklyn, okay? My accent is a ****ing Brooklyn accent, okay? Okay?
Goodfellas
"Now take me to jail"
Champ: I will smash you head through a car windshield....and then take you mother, Dorothy Mantooth, out for a nice seafood dinner and never call her again...
Wes Mantooth: Dorothy Mantooth is a saint, Dorothy Mantooth is a saint!!
I’d like to introduce myself to you all……. People call me the Bry man; I'm the stylish one of the group. I know what you're asking yourself and the answer is yes. I have a nick name for my penis. It’s called the Octagon, but I also nick named my testes - my left one is James Westfall and my right one is Doctor Kenneth Noisewater. You ladies play your cards right you just might get to meet the whole gang.
Anchorman
Brick: where did you get those clothes from??.......the ...toilet store...
i don't know what we're yelling about
Brick: i read somewhere that their periods attract bears. the bears can smell the menstration.
Brian: well that's just great....ya hear that Ed? Bears. now you're putting the whole station in jeopardy
you know how i know you're gay?
how? Cos you're gay and you can tel who other gay people are?
.oh so you wrote "ho for sho"
"yeah, i remember that girl.....she was a ho"
We use cookies and similar technologies for the following purposes:
Do you accept cookies and these technologies?
We use cookies and similar technologies for the following purposes:
Do you accept cookies and these technologies?