2010/11 Premier League Thread

no bother if berba leaves, owen's just signed for another season.
and allardyce at upton park...i really hope not.

Well Robbie Fowler has quit the A-League in order to go back to England to get his coaching levels..

Going to start up a new Thread tomorrow relating to off-season transfers

Don't think Macheda will leave or be sold like you said.

ljandkg said:

I'd change a few things - Gerrard was rubbish last year, and in the world cup, will be interesting to see how he goes this year. I'd put Milner from Villa in there. Rooney doesn't play on the wing. I'd have something like this...

Cech
Cole Vidic, terry Evra
Bellamy (City) Lampard, Milner, Lennon (Spurs)
Shrek and Drogba

Tevez and Dunne off the bench. Bellamy had a great season for City, scoring 2 at Old Trafford, and carving up Chelsea as well. Lennon was excellent and a big reason why Spurs made the top 4

I wouldn't have Torres or Fabregas because if u check the stats those guys, as good as they are, hardly even played last year!!!!! Like your backline though. Evra was excellent for United, as was Cole for Chelski.

As for City's transfers - we've got too many players!!! I've been very happy we've gotten Boateng, a big 21 year old fullback who was excellent for Germany in the WC. He was the only guy who shut down David Villa in the whole tourney.
Silva will cover for Bellers likely shifting or retiring. The other player we got was Yaya Toure from Barca to hopefully fill the Roy Keane role as a box to box player. Could do with Balotelli but he's a head case so wouldn't worry me if we ended up with another striker behind Tevez and Adebayor.

City now have a young strong deep team. Can they play together though? And can Mancini manage game time to keep everyone happy???

I've picked Chelsea to win again. with United, Arse and Man City to make the 4 but not necessarily in that order. I hope we win a cup!!!! Haven't won one since I was 3!!!

United are a Rooney injury away from big trouble. They're in financial strife and have 4000 season tickets to sell yet - a sign the club is splintered with it's owners. Arsenal will be sharp as always- if Fabregas stays as it appears he will they'll be tough. Liverpool's season depends on Torres staying. Kuyt can't score the goals they'll need. Cole is a great signing for them and their new Manager Hodgson is excellent. Just don't think they're as deep as City.

Warney - look forward to your contributions, arguing with u all year!! And I can't wait for the season to start!!!

United - who have they signed?? Hernandez a Mexican?? Will he back up Shrek or play with him??

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Just before this thread is put to bed - interesting to read what I thought would happen!! I got the top 4 right and City won a cup!! Was wrong about United (I blame SAf for that!!)
Kuyt scored plenty of goals and COLE AN EXCELLENT SIGNING FOR LIVERPOOL - What a genius I am!!

ljandkg said:

Just before this thread is put to bed - interesting to read what I thought would happen!! I got the top 4 right and City won a cup!! Was wrong about United (I blame SAf for that!!)
Kuyt scored plenty of goals and COLE AN EXCELLENT SIGNING FOR LIVERPOOL - What a genius I am!!

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haha Hodgson was a great manager at Liverpool??

and do you know who Hernandez is now..?

Mock the Weekend, a goal.com article that i look at each week has made it's End of Season awards.. think i might copy some of the better ones for all to see.


Best comeback (joint award with worst collapse)
Newcastle & Arsenal

When Arsene Wenger's men went into the dressing room in St James' Park 4-0 up at half-time in February they must have thought the job was done and dusted – and they certainly played like they already had been given the three points in a crazy second half.

The Toon fought back with the sort of guts that the Gunners must envy, with Chieck Tiote's wonder strike late on sealing one of the Premier League's all-time greatest comebacks.

It also proved to be the first sign that Arsenal would blow it all. Before that game, the Gunners were five points off the top of the table. After it, Wojciech Szczesny and Laurent Koscielny brilliantly gifted Birmingham the League Cup, then they pathetically failed to take a shot against Barcelona at Camp Nou, just days before they were easily booted out of the FA Cup by a Manchester United side that featured seven (SEVEN!) defenders.

The Gunners were so traumatised after that result at Newcastle that they won only three more Premier League games in the season. Only Arsenal could cock it up so spectacularly.

Best goal
John Pantsil (Fulham vs Liverpool)

In front of the Kop at Anfield, the Ghanaian deftly controlled the ball before flicking it over the keeper and stroking it home. He couldn't believe what he'd done and just stood there, mesmerised by his own brilliance, and put his hands to his head. Except it was in the wrong net, and he'd actually lofted the ball over Mark Schwarzer and given Liverpool the win. What a muppet.

Honourable nods also to Wayne Rooney for his slightly-less-technically-brilliant-than-Pantsil's-wonder-strike overhead kick to win the Manchester derby, Charlie Adam for a host of outstanding free kicks, Johan Elmander for his twisty-turny genius goal at Molineux, Tuncay Sanli for a solo stunner for Stoke against Manchester United, Robin van Persie for capping off the best counterattack of the season against Wolves, and Dirk Kuyt for pinching a wondergoal off Luis Suarez by tapping in after the Uruguayan had beaten four Manchester United defenders in the box before stroking it across the face of goal.

Worst celebration
Wayne Rooney (Manchester United vs West Ham)

The striker proved himself to be a terrible role model (as if the prostitutes, holding his employers to ransom and mouthing off about England fans hadn't already) when he swore directly into the homes of millions of viewers across the world against the Hammers after completing a remarkable comeback at Upton Park.

It was ******* stupid. What a ****.

Best performance of the season
Barcelona against Real Madrid at the Bernabeu

Pedro, Dani Alves and Sergio Busquets all excelled in the first leg of the Champions League semi-final, and are believed to be in the running for next year's Oscars for their theatrics in the Spanish capital.

Best goalkeeper
Nemanja Vidic (Manchester United)

Theo Walcott fired over an inch-perfect cross (probably his one and only of the season) that had 'GOAL' written all over it as it flew towards Robin van Persie to nod home, only for it be diverted by the Serb's outstanding fingertip save.

£20 million on David de Gea? Pfft, Manchester United already have the perfect replacement for Edwin van der Sar.

Biggest motormouth
Ian Holloway (Blackpool)

When is this guy not talking? And when is this guy not talking gobbledygook?

Ian Holloway quote of the season

"You are talking out of your hat. I would like to say out of your ass, but that's a donkey and I don't like having a go at donkeys."

Best U-turn
Wayne Rooney (Manchester United)

The England striker had the whole football world up in arms after announcing his intention to leave Old Trafford in October because he felt the team could not win things… and then changed his mind a few days later when he was offered a mega new deal worth over £200,000 a week assurances over new players.

A disgraceful episode from the 25-year-old, who publicly held his club to ransom simply to make himself a fortune at a time when he was playing dreadfully.

Shot of the season (joint award with Biggest prat)
Ashley Cole (Chelsea)

The left-back acted like a naughty schoolboy by bringing some toys into training with him, except instead of a slingshot it was an air rifle that the idiot brought in, and he used it to shoot a work experience student, thus re-confirming that he is the most loathsome man in the Premier League.


Best tweeter
Rio Ferdinand (Manchester United)

The England centre-back excelled himself this season. Not on it, but off it, with some fantastic work on Twitter, most notably his Ray Wilkins-inspired 'stay on your feet' campaign, which is still going to this day.

Worst tweeter
Jonjo Shelvey (Liverpool)

The young midfielder and full-time Dr Evil lookalike shot to prominence earlier this year by 'accidentally' posting a picture of his meat and two veg to the social networking site before swiftly having his account deleted. (For those wondering – he's totally bald all over.)

One man who certainly isn't hairless and who only narrowly missed out on this booby prize is Wayne Rooney, who when he isn't challenging his followers to fights or telling the world to follow his thuggish brother because he's got plenty of "banter", is shaving his IQ into his chest.

Worst manager
Roy Hodgson (Liverpool)

Brought in amid much media hype, the former Fulham man was said to be the man to steady the ship after Rafael Benitez's dismissal and Hicks & Gillett's catastrophic ownership. The warning signs should have come the day Woy was gleefully snapped shaking hands with Joe Cole after the club confirmed his signing on a free, which was still a rip off.

It wasn't just the football that was bad under Hodgson, it was the results, the press conferences, the atmosphere, and the astonishingly defeatist attitude (he described a limp loss to Everton as Liverpool's "best performance of the season").

Just imagine what hilariousness would have ensued had the man who signed Paul Konchesky, Christian Poulsen and Cole been in charge when Liverpool recouped £50 million for Fernando Torres in January?

Best manager
Roy Hodgson (West Brom)

"Say whaaaaat?" – you may be asking, but look at what he's done since taking over at The Hawthorns. He's been the exact opposite of the imbecile who was in charge at Anfield and is loved by the fans, who have been served up some great football and the results to go with it.

Scott Parker came a close second for this award after taking over all the team talks for West Ham, for whom he was so inspirational that he made Carlton Cole cry at half-time prior to a miraculous comeback at West Brom.


Worst player
Jermain Defoe (Tottenham)

Eight months it took this useless sack of spuds to get a league goal. EIGHT MONTHS. A rotting corpse could get a couple of goals from set pieces in the Premier League with the amount of games it took the midget striker to score.

Most ridiculous owners
David Gold & David Sullivan (West Ham)

Hiring Avram Grant was bad enough, but undermining him at every opportunity was even worse. With plenty of games left to ensure the Hammers' survival the pair were mouthing off about the team having no hope, about certain players not caring, and basically kicking the ladder to safety away from underneath the club.

It would be amiss not to mention Roman Abramovich here, who saw fit to sack a double-winning coach despite burdening him with a useless £50m waste of space halfway through the season. Top work, go buy yourself another yacht upon which you can watch your team fail to win the Champions League.

Best transfer
Fernando Torres (Liverpool to Chelsea)

Because the Spaniard's repeated failure to score for three months pretty much wrote Mock the Weekend for me every week.

Worst debut
Wayne Bridge (West Ham)

The former England left-back (how desperate were the Three Lions then, eh?) made the switch to east London in January after spending his time at Manchester City being rubbish and not shaking hands with people.

In his first game, against Arsenal, he played his man onside to score the opener, gave away a penalty for the second before making a hat-trick of defensive stupidity by not closing his opponent down for the third. And yet still only the second most humiliating experience of Wayne Bridge's recent past.

Best chant
Liverpool fans for "Dalglish, Dalglish, Dalglish, Dalglish, Dalglish, Dalglish, Dalglish, Dalglish, Dalglish, Dalglish"

This hypnotic wave of noise seemed to work as the club's owners soon sacked Roy Hodgson and thawed Kenny Dalglish out of his managerial freezer.

Maybe Arsenal fans could do the same to convince Arsene Wenger to get his finger out by simply chanting: "Spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend."

Mock the Season's comedy XI

Heurelho 'Between the legs' Gomes
Gary 'Shameful last three games' Neville
Sol 'Should have retired five years ago' Campbell
Sebastien 'French international, somehow' Squillaci
Paul 'As bad as he is bald' Konchesky
Joe 'Joke Hole' Cole
Lee 'Red card' Cattermole
Eidur 'Too fat for two clubs' Gudjohnsen
Robbie 'Moany, angry, shouty, pointy, rubbish' Keane
Fernando '£50m of absolute tosh' Torres
Michael 'I don't understand why I'm not in the England team even though I'm rubbish' Owen

Manager - Arsene 'We can win the quadruple... We can win the treble... We can win the double... We can win the league... We can finish second... We can finish third... Next year is our year' Wenger

Some funny stuff there!!!! Love the Wenger line at the end!!!!

Anyone got a link to that Pantsil goal??

Horrible!

Man, that took some skill!!!! haha Thanks Warney!

Mark Hughes has quit from Fulham.

Not much action so far in the transfers.. Neuer is officially a Munich player but apart from that barely anything important..

Man United's Wayne Rooney: I've had a hair transplant - ESPN Soccernet

if its true, hes throwing his money away, and if its not, its not all that funny a hoax.

as for transfers, hughes to chelsea? what a mistake that would be. and hiddink is a mercenary. dont think hed do well at stamford bridge. personally i think hes highly over-rated...
oh and friedel has gone to white hart lane. not really a long-term prospect there...

he can have a hair transplant if he wants!

Warney said:

he can have a hair transplant if he wants!

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yeah of course. i just meant that its not a funny hoax (if it is) and if its true, theyre not doing a very good job. still looks as bald as ever...

sgt_pepper said:

Man United's Wayne Rooney: I've had a hair transplant - ESPN Soccernet

if its true, hes throwing his money away, and if its not, its not all that funny a hoax.

as for transfers, hughes to chelsea? what a mistake that would be. and hiddink is a mercenary. dont think hed do well at stamford bridge. personally i think hes highly over-rated...
oh and friedel has gone to white hart lane. not really a long-term prospect there...

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Hughes is a one trick pony - when he was coaching City he'd set up and if things went wrong (which they did a lot at the defensive end) he had no idea. I would love it if he went to Chelsea....
Also agree about Hiddink.

sgt_pepper said:

yeah of course. i just meant that its not a funny hoax (if it is) and if its true, theyre not doing a very good job. still looks as bald as ever...

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its true and it happened 2 days ago.. (the transplant) and theres been no photos yet

Be ready for more sensational news on the clean living Ryan Giggs............(clue - bro's wife - 8 yr affair)

ljandkg said:

Be ready for more sensational news on the clean living Ryan Giggs............(clue - bro's wife - 8 yr affair)

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shhh...manutd players can do no wrong around here.

sgt_pepper said:

shhh...manutd players can do no wrong around here.

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why the smart a*** comment? have i defended anyone?

Warney said:

why the smart a*** comment? have i defended anyone?

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well most recently you defended rooney in his hair transplant. couldnt even make a joke without you sticking up for his rights to look like a douche...
wasnt trying to offend you. just a bit of jiving...

Damn Giggs. I thought John Terry was low

Not being too optimistic about my transfer hopes am i?